Decisions are not difficult to make, difficult part is to stop waiting for decisions to be made for you. We grow up listening to stories about miracles, watching movies where things just happen and somehow we find it difficult to get over these stories. It's difficult to say why we prefer things to happen to us rather than pick up the wheel and drive to where we want. And I have noticed that most of the men and women I know are strong minded people who have made hard decisions once they were convinced that decision will have to be made by them only. But I have also seen that wavering, that indecision, that hope of someone else making the right decision. The most capable people seem to develop an unfounded confidence in someone else's capability . It's strange. There is always that other group which would jump to make decisions for others but no I wont discuss them today.

I guess we as a society judge a man by how things turn out for him rather than how things were for him. It's like this ...say India is playing Australia and they are 17/5 in reply to 275, and this one gentleman make this prophecy that India would win and though realistically this would never happen but just for sake of argument let's accept that India goes on to win. Now this guy would be hailed as the greatest expert on cricket. He will be giving hundreds of interviews with strange theories about why he said what he did. But yeah he would be a hero. Soemhow we are fixated with our desire to get it right in future rather than to do it right now. Reminds me of "Arms and the Man" by Shaw. Our heroes are never practical they are always courageous. I have deep appreciation for self belief and strength of human spirit, but i believe that it's unfair to liberally use those terms to romanticize illogical feats.

But I seem to be drifting, and anyways reluctance to take command of our own lives have deeper reasons than just social conditioning. May be faith in God has a role to play as well , hope for a miracle. But I think biggest reason is absence of a power source to drive up enough force to disturb the inertia. We need reasons to do things, while there are enough reasons available but they must add up in a way that a person is compelled to make a decision. It's physics i guess. I must act because....... that because need to be a strong force, very strong force. Because how often we see that while everyone else is convinced a particular thing need be done, principal actor is still not willing to make a move...why's so? When he should be the most concerned? What's he waiting for? What's his plan ? I guess he is waiting for those situations to add up to ensure that they drive him to action, that explains why men driven to most impossible situations achieve the most heoic feats. I guess in those situations they just get enough motivation to make the most determined action. Till a situation exceeds a threshold desperation, a human being just dont get convinced enough to act to change things. Well this threshold could be different for different people, there may be vector addition of reaosns and so things may not just add up but whatever it is trust me it's a fascinating study. And more need to be understood and written about it. Let's see.....

-sid