Do you know why Will Smith titled his movie – Pursuit of Happyness?
That’s because God had copy rights on the phrase “Pursuit of Happiness”. Yeah, that’s what He calls life up there.

And isn’t it what life is all about – Pursuit of Happiness. Just in case you think, key word there is Happiness – gotcha – you are wrong. Key word there is “Pursuit”. A pursuit that gets defeated by shortness of life. I suggest that next time they find a star really distant from earth – they should name it ‘Happiness’. Just think about the headline in newspaper next day :
Happiness discovered five million light years away from Earth
Apt. Isn’t it? Even if man can travel at speed of light, longest one has ever lived is 110-120 years, so no would ever get to even reach closer to Happiness. [- the star]

Did any of you used to see those mythological serials on Doordashan long back – they used to show Gods talking and whenever they wanted to punish someone they would pack him to earth. I used to think of it as a pretty easy deal on the culprit ;-) Guess, now I have discovered my Godliness ;-), now I can make perfect sense why anyone would do that. Probably, earth is actually a prison for souls that did something wrong on some planet beta and so they were given a jail uniform (read human body) and sent to this prison, where they get to do jail hours (read work) to earn their living and serve their time (read life) till they can go back again to planet beta ;-)

Now am sure you would have seen those smiling faces and must have heard those ringing laughter – don’t be fooled. It was joy, not happiness. Yeah, life does have enough joy to offer – that’s God’s way of making it up to us. So He packs the joy in small boxes and drops it from up there for us to catch. Remind me again of DD – news this time – that footage of army men dropping food packets from air force planes in flooded areas. That’s how life is - flooded with unhappiness – but for humanitarian reasons – God keeps dropping us those packets of joy – few of us catch them, thank God for that and rest of us wonder what’s there in that packet. We look at that smile and mistook it to be happiness, but its just joy my dear friends. Joy which will not last anyone for ever, coz it’s just instantaneous & ephemeral.

I wonder, why God even gave hope to humans that they can be happy – its sheer cruelty – I mean, just plain tell them, you gonna be a wretched lot down there. One learns to live with his lot. But nopes He chose to be sheer mean and cruel. And for His sadistic pleasure He invented ‘hope’, so that He can look at people living in a constant hope that they can be happy, things can be better. And poor us, we cling on to hope and keep up the ‘pursuit’.

I remember that tale about Lord Buddha, where he had asked a woman whose young child has died, that go get a bowl of rice from a home where no one has ever died and then He would bring her son back to life. Similarly, today I wanna play God, so just show me a man who has been truly happy in his life and I will put you in a constant state of bliss as well !!!

And so he stood again in the battlefield of Kurushektra with a feeling of déjà vu. It felt exactly the same. Same as it was a day before. No one else remembered it but him. Only he knew that what is going to start in few minutes has played out earlier also.

And he also remembered how it has ended. Abhimanyu was standing again in Kurushektra just a day after he got killed by Jaydrath. Army of Kauravas had the same Chakravyuh formation. He was still the only one who knew how to get into this chakravyuh, he still didn’t know how to get out of it. But this time only thing that has changed was that now he was aware that last time he got himself killed battling his way out of that Chakravyuh.

It was not supposed to be like this. Battle of Mahabharata was to proceed without him. He had played out his part and he was no more to be part of this. But he wanted another shot. Life rarely gives another shot but he insisted. As he stood before God in Heaven, he asked Him to let him live that last day of his life once again. He wanted to get it right this time. He wanted to beat Kauravas, he wanted to be the victor and so as he insisted, God relented. And so Abhimanyu got another chance.

He had thought that this time he wont make the mistakes he made earlier, he would be more cautious now, he would benefit from his knowledge of past. But suddenly as he stood in his chariot moments before conch was to announce beginning of day’s battle, he realized none of that was to happen. He didn’t even know if he made any mistake last time – he hardly did, he was also as cautious as he could be and knowledge of past was hardly an asset as it only reminded him that his best was not enough last time, that no matter how hard he tried he still couldn’t figure a way out of chakravyuh. And he suddenly realized that there is nothing that could go any different this time. If he chose to enter the chakravyuh, he would not get out. And then he remembered face of God as He agreed to let him go and live that last day again. He had just smiled, just as you let the kid has his way knowing fully well that he still can’t change anything.

He suddenly realized how naïve he was to think that he could change the course of life, that he could challenge the fate and come out winners, that just because has lost once before –he would win this time.

And then he heard the conch, and he made his way to chakravyuh. Knowing fully well how it could end but hoping it would end some other way. But when have hopes ever got better of fate? It all played out just as it did a day before. Jaydrath killed Abhimanyu again. Fate & life conspired to get their way once more.

Living on foreign shores, away from hustle and bustle of India, one thing that I have realized is that those festivals which used to announce themselves months in advance back home, slip by quietly like strangers here.

I remember that as I kid I grew up with, dusshera, lohri, rakhi, janmashtmi, basant panchmi etc. and navratri & ganesh chaturthi joined in during later years. And Holi & Diwali the Big 2 were always there. But somehow over years, I kept losing touch with them one by one, and am more or less left with only Holi & Diwali now.

And though I don't know why, but Diwali was always been my favourite festival. As a kid, initially it were the firecrackers which used to be the major draw but as I grew up and gave up on patakhas, Diwali's place in my list of favourites saw no change. Rather I only got further enamoured by Diwali; sight of diyas lighting up the night held me spellbounded every year without fail. Frankly, if I have a choice I would do away with all the electric lighting and just put Diyas everywhere on Diwali night. They are so beautiful and so surreal. Reminiscent of old world beauty and elegance.

I know I gonna miss all that this Diwali. May be I won't have any diyas that day, even if I find few for my house I know I can't walk out and find every house lit up, doors open, children running around, people all dressed up and smiles just having a field day on everyone's face.

But I just hope everyone back home in India will have lots of such sights.

And as for me, if i switch off all the lights and light up a lot of diyas - it would make a decent sight, rite ;-)

HAPPY DIWALI to one and all :)

शुभ दीपावली !!!

While putting together few words recently, I realized they ended up looking like couplets.
So thought will post some of them here...

कुछ हवा का ज़ोर था, कुछ बादलों की मर्ज़ी थी
वो उड़ गए वही से, जहाँ छीटों की कुछ ज़रूरत थी
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किसी ने पी के भुला दिया ग़म को
किसी ने रो के बहा दिया ग़म को
इक मैं हूँ जो ना पीता हूँ, ना रोता हूँ
इसलिए तमाम रात, आँखों मे गुज़र करता हूँ
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रश्क करता हूँ मैं सितारों की किस्मत से
काश की मेरे पास भी हर रात , मेरा चाँद होता
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अब तो तुम ख़्वाबों मे भी नहीं आती मेरे
कोई भला किसी से कहाँ इतना ख़फा होता हैं
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चलो कुछ देर और इंतज़ार किया जाएँ,
किसी उम्मीद से रोशन जहाँ किया जाएँ,
दुआएँ असर होने मे वक्त लेती हैं
इतने जल्दी मायूस ना हुआ जाएँ
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Album Recommendation for the day:

While my attempts at poetry may not cut much ice with many but hear the Poems CD of Dus Kahaniyan. It has got some terrific pieces of poetry by none other than Gulzar. You better brush up your urdu though as it does have fair sprinkling of not so common words but trust me its a must hear.

My current fav from this album:

तुझे भूलने लगा हूँ मैं अब... & उसे फिर लौट के जाना हैं ये मालूम था ...